So!!!! I went to my cardiologist Friday (bless their 'we wanna help but don't have a clue' hearts). Just kidding...lol They have been wonderful, and they have done the best that they could do under the circumstances.
They basically told me that time's running out for the old ticker I've got now.....and I need to make that decision they've been 'hounding' me about for the last 10 or so years........whether or not to get a new blood-pumping muscle. Well.....not really a NEW one. More like an already-been-used-but don't-need-it-any-more-and-you-can-have-it-now heart. And just in case anyone gets offended with my humor....it's MY body and if I want to make jokes I have a RIGHT TO!! Get over it. Deal with it. Move on. Well??? MOVE!!!!
Anyway......a little about my heart anatomy. The RV does what the LV is supposed to do and they are also in opposite positions. The RV can't take the high pressure anymore. Poor thing. It's held out as long as it could....but it just can't do it anymore. AND my tricuspid valve (which should be the mitral) is leaking beyond repair. The doctors said no more 'repair' surgeries. No more new medicines to try. This is it. I have to make that decision. I NEED A TRANSPLANT!
The doctors had a sense of urgency about them yesterday. They want to see me again in two weeks. TWO WEEKS!!!! They've NEVER wanted that before. :O
And YES!!!! I'm scared!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I don't know what to do. Lots of issues are running through my head: will I make it, the surgery, the cost (during.....and forever after), the amount of meds I will be required to take, rejection, recovery, being away from home, what about my precious pets,.....you know....the usual stuff that runs through the head when faced with something like this. I guess my main thing is my pets. I know that sounds silly, but hey, I AM CCL (Crazy Cat Lady).
I kinda just wish they could take a piece of my heart, grow me a new heart, and put that back in my chest. It's just a thought.
It's alot to take in.....and alot to deal with. Thank God for my daughter! She's my rock!
Well.....off to live some more life....laugh a bit harder.....and have tea and chocolate with my 'rock'.
4 comments:
I know it is a lot to take in at once, for me the heart transplant "just happened" at once, even though I knew that it was going to happen for many years before it actually happened.
It is a lot to pray about and ask people to pray for you. You just have to give it to god.
I felt totally better after transplant, and through all the hardships that it has been totally worth it. If you have any questions, you can email me.
Thank you for the encouraging words. My daughter seems to think it will be worth it :)
It can be a tough decision. I struggled with it, too. Mainly because of my muscular dystrophy which is what caused the heart failure in the 1st place. One of the possible complications for me was that the prednisone could accelerate my muscle degeneration. My thinking was why would I want to get a new heart and run the risk of being to weak to enjoy it ?? God took care of me and the accelerated muscle degeneration did not happen. I've been blessed to enjoy a bunch of things since the transplant that I wouldn't if I had given in to the fear. I think Allie said it best to just give it to God. If I can add my 2 cents, it would be "Just Do It !"
@2nd Chance.......thanks for your input. My daughter and I have about decided it would be the best thing to do the transplant. We still have MANY more things we want to do together, and I'm getting to the point where I can't right now.
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